My wife is having an affair with a government executive. His role is to manage a project whose progress is seen worldwide as a demonstration of American leadership. (This might seem hyperbolic, but it is not an exaggeration.) ... I strongly feel that exposing the affair will create a major distraction that would adversely impact the success of an important effort. My issue: Should I acknowledge this affair and finally force closure? Should I suffer in silence for the next year or two for a project I feel must succeed? ...The rumor is that this letter was written by Paula Broadwell's husband, and refers to General David Petraeus, but the NY Times denies it on Twitter.
Don’t expose the affair in any high-profile way. It would be different if this man’s project was promoting some (contextually hypocritical) family-values platform, but that doesn’t appear to be the case. The only motive for exposing the relationship would be to humiliate him and your wife, and that’s never a good reason for doing anything. This is between you and your spouse. You should tell her you want to separate, just as you would if she were sleeping with the mailman. ...
I halfway suspect you’re writing this letter because you want specific people to read this column and deduce who is involved and what’s really going on behind closed doors (without actually addressing the conflict in person). That’s not ethical, either.
She is a super high achiever:
Paula Broadwell, whose affair with the nation’s C.I.A. director led to his resignation on Friday, was the valedictorian of her high school class and homecoming queen, a fitness champion at West Point with a graduate degree from Harvard, and a model for a machine gun manufacturer.So why does such a woman become a home-wrecker? Simple hypergamy. He was the most respected and high status general in the world. Her obsession with using the 60-year-old war-hero to further her own career turned the married mother of two into a shameless self-promoting prom queen. For him, just look at the pictures.
The timing of the Obama administration decision to expose Petraeus is suspicious. It is right after the election, and right before he was scheduled to testify about Libya. Obama is lucky that his incompetent and dishonest handling of Benghazi was not more of a campaign issue. The single women were more interested in those free birth control pills, I guess.
I have criticized the NY Times ethicist before. The column is no longer written by a Jew, but the paper is dominated by liberal Jewish views.
The striking part of the Ethicist advice is that the husband should only publicly stand up to being cuckolded if it serves the political goal of destroying family values.
I am just facing the facts about human nature here. Men are always attracted to younger and more beautiful women. Even the most successful women are driven by hypergamy. Our feminist-infected culture is determined to destroy marriage and family values. Last week's election has convinced me that we have reached a tipping point.
A UK newspaper reports:
The lonely legacy of my Sex And The City lifestyle: Claudia Connell gives a painfully honest account of how she came to be living alone in middle-ageI wonder if Sandra Fluke and the other feminist Obama supporters realize that this is what is in store for them.
What none of us spent too long thinking about in our 20s and 30s was how our lifestyles would impact on us once we reached middle-age, when we didn’t want to go out and get sozzled on cocktails and had replaced our stilettos and skinny jeans with flat shoes and elasticated waists.
When I look around at all my single friends — and there are a lot of them — not one of them is truly happy being on her own. Suddenly, all those women we pitied for giving up their freedom for marriage and children are the ones feeling sorry for us.
Freedom is great when you can exploit it; but when you have so much that you don’t know what to do with it, then it all becomes a little pointless. ...
In the Nineties, we professional, single women conducted our love-lives according to a best-selling book called The Rules — a dating bible that dictated that we should be aloof and hard to get, that we should not return phone calls, and we should always make a man pay on dates. Any man who didn’t conform was to be kicked to the curb until the next poor sap came along.
What I never considered, though, was that one day they’d stop coming along altogether. I really wish I’d known that once you’re in your late 30s, men are pretty thin on the ground. And once you’re in your 40s, it’s as though they’ve been wiped off the face of the Earth.