Saturday, October 22, 2011

What more can I do?

When a wife complains about her husband, she usually makes it sound as if she has a legitimate complaint. Sometimes not. Here is yesterday's letter Dear Annie:
Dear Annie: My husband and I have been married more than 40 years. ... I rarely, if ever, let him see me undressed. I turn off any TV program that makes any reference to love or sex as soon as he comes into the room. I never participate in any pastime that he enjoys.

I always make sure I am reading or applying hand lotion when I come to bed. I push him away anytime he approaches me. I never respond to his inquiries as to why he is so repulsive to me or what he could do to make his approaches less objectionable. I don't want it to be "better." I want him to stop.

I suggested separate bedrooms, but he said, "Then move out." In spite of all this, every six or eight weeks, he wants to grope me for half the night. He expects me to respond — even participate. ... What more can I do? — Sick of It
What more can she do? Is she serious? Does she really believe that she is doing all that she can for a happy marriage? She sounds like Hell to me.


Ragnar said...

What I don't get is why do you guys put with this shit. If you are too pussy whipped to kick these bitches to the curb you fucking deserve what you get.

Anonymous said...

hate to say it but commentary that inflammatory and nasty isn't going to help things.

If we're going to change the family law system it's going to take both men and women to get it together. Yes, men get the shaft big time but to be fair I've seen more than my share of mom's getting the royal screw job too.

The incentives for creating the divide and conquer animosity between the divorcing parties have to be eliminated for starters.

So please, let's keep the dialog civil and constructive. I get p.o'd too but let's look at the hows and whys and figure out how to deal with them.

Curiepoint said...

There's nothing to "help".

Men did not start this war, so it's not up to them to ignore half a century of misandry and entitlement and cross the divide with hat in hand and pride crushed under foot.

Men want to be sure of who they are without being considered criminals. Men want to be in a position to say, just as women have said, "This is the line that you will not cross. This is who I am, and you are not going to make me a criminal for it."

We do not need nor want their charity. The original post deals with a woman who wants to keep her slave husband but not give anything back. If I were the husband in this situation, I would do more than "suggest" she leave; I would wait for her to leave on an errand, change the locks, and throw her shit out onto the front lawn. Alternatively, I would hire a hooker and bring her home and tell the non-wife: "Hi Desiree. You want to be a frigid bitch, then I will take my needs somewhere else. Since you don't care, you don't mind, right?"

I'll bet the advice columnist sided with her and called the man to the carpet for daring to want love and affection from this beast.

George said...

Actually the advice columnist said, "we believe intimacy is an important part of marriage". I would have thought that everyone would agree with that statement.

I am not trying to trash women here. I am just pointing out that some people have a very funny idea of marriage. This wife is doing everything she can to alienate her husband, and she doesn't seem to think that she is doing anything wrong.

Anonymous said...

I am not disagreeing w/the original posting here nor the follow up comments except for the one at 11:06. I'm completely sympathetic as I've felt exactly that way, just asking we keep the language a little less inflammatory. Provocation by conflicting ideas articulated w/o rancor moves things forward.

Anonymous said...

What's interesting is that they've been married 40 years. Was it always that way for them? Not wanting sex used to be grounds for annulment.