Monday, January 16, 2006

Reader complains about evaluator

A reader wrote:
George, I think you did a great web site. I am a women, but still found it very interesting. I know that the system really sucks for both genders. I'm an advocate for others too. I go to court, research, mediate, what ever. I'm trying to make a business of it, but I end up volunteering too much. No formal experience but smarter than any mediator in court.

I have a client who is now fighting for her 4 year old not to see the dad because the 4 year old said her dad was inappropriate. (I'll leave out details.) Well, Melissa and Jay both think she is just trying to allienate the dad and wants to reverse time share. The 4 year old has never spent more than 4 hours with the dad and now they want to give him weekends and other overnights.

First, she can't protect her daughter.
second, her daughter will be taken away from the only person she trusts.
third, will now be away for too long a time for that age, since she has not so far
fifth, stats show he is completly wrong. Why not error on the safe side. Is it kids we are protecting or the parent? If she is lying, it will come out soon. If not, the girl will be saved.
sixth, Melissa and Jay thought it was funny as they testified in court. How fitting.
seventh, EVEN, if you don't believe he did anything, then why not set up plan to increase time gradually like any other case that is sensitive to the needs of the young child?

Every time I go by the court house, it's like darkness. My client and I want to help others that have abuse issues to fight. Do you know any? Just like you, don't want people to research what has already been done.

I wish there wasn't this stigma of male vs. female. We are all in the same boat. Unless there is statistics to prove otherwise, I've seen as much bias for both sexes.

Maybe they decide by the number of letters in your name, or the color of your shirt? That would probably work out better. At least you'd know it was a crap shoot and not expect honesty.

Any other people or articles you know of about Jay would be appreciated. I think he shows bias to those he knows. I know of two of two firemen that come out way ahead for instance.

Thanks for listening, [name omitted], divorced 1998, 2 children, finally out of court 2 years now.
I had no direct dealings with Jay Muccilli, but I did try to check him out. He is a psychologist and custody evaluator for the family court. He seems to have a good reputation with the court and with other custody evaluators.

I happened to run into two people who had Muccilli for custody evaluators. Both denounced Muccilli in the most emphatic terms. The two had no connection with each other, but told me similar stories. One was a man and one was a woman, so it was not just sex bias. They described him as lazy and incompetent, and strongly recommended avoiding him.

Now you might think that I would trust the authorities more than some disgruntled litigants, but I know for a fact that the authorities tolerate gross incompetence. They even encourage behaviors that are, in my opinion, illegal and unethical, and harmful to children and parents.

I ultimately decided to avoid Jay Muccilli.

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