Sunday, March 20, 2005

The Lazy Husband

From a new book, called The Lazy Husband:
Our view of parenthood has also been changed by the fact that many parents of today have gone through their own psychotherapy and gained a thorough understanding of the ways that their parents harmed, neglected, or mistreated them. As a result, they know firsthand the damage that can be done through parental errors, and feel terrified that they'll hurt their children in the same way that they felt hurt by their parents. Knowing the mistakes of their parents may cause them to be fiercely committed to be the kind of parent that they never had. Unfortunately, many pursue this entirely noble task at the costs to their own health and the health of their marriages.

While men are hardly immune to these worries, women are bearing the major brunt of this child emphasis. This is because this increased consciousness occurs at a time when, among other things, mothers are less likely than ever to have the time, resources, and energy to do what they would like to be good mothers.
Author Joshua Coleman perpetuates a number of silly myths about men and women, and gives full-time housewives advice on how to get their working husbands to do the laundry, cooking, and cleaning.

As you may have guess, Coleman is a psychologist. No one else would think that psychotherapy has helped anyone learn all the good and bad parenting habits.

My wife probably thought that I was a lazy husband. Of course he never did any laundry for me, and hardly ever did any cooking or cleaning for me either. She would say, "I am not your maid" to remind me.

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